From meeting hundreds of Men and women for coaching and matchmaking service, you start to notice certain patterns, common requirements which people mention in a partner, such as good sense of humour, intelligence, an open mind, sometimes it gets a bit cliché, which is why we push them to get a real understanding of their values. When it comes to physical attraction, pre requisites, for men size is important, not in the asking for specific measurements way, but its important for many for the woman to be in good shape. Women’s measurement requirements are different, although beer guts are certainly not on the tick list.
Their concern is more based on height. Regardless of whether the woman is 5’1 or 5’10. ” He has to be taller”. Is one of the most common demands.
5’9 is the most common minimal height requirement request.
As Matchmakers we are able to help single women see the ‘bigger picture’ by boosting him with his other wonderful attributes, and urging them to have more depth in their choices. Lets face it- a guy can’t help what he was born with and high heels were not designed for them. It would be a great shame to pass up a great guy, based on just being able to say he stands more statuesque next to you.
Take Sally, who I met in a bar with her husband Tom, they were a very happily married couple, with two children, and were still clearly very much in love.
Tom was 5’6 and Sally was the same, but taller than him in heels.
‘When we first met, I told my friends, he was nice, but not boyfriend material, because he was too short, they told me I was mad, I’m glad I listened, as my life would be very different if I hadn’t picked him’. She recalls.
If introduced by friends or matchmakers, short guys get a fairer shot at finding love. But online, competition is fierce, and tall guys are at an advantage.
The thing about online dating is, it allows you to filter out your choices, and age and height are the top choices of filter. We tried this experiment by creating an account on behalf of a coaching client, and the results were quire astounding.
We made 2 accounts, all of the information was the same, the only difference was in one profile he was 5’5 and the other 5’10, here were our results.
Mutual Matches- 5’5/5’10
Views in 1 week- 22/ 312
Messages received- 1/45
Messages sent- 20/20
Replies received- 0/14
Seems online dating is not the ideal place for short men to meet women, unless you are willing to bend the truth about your height.
Although, the top complaint from women about meeting men online, is they feel deceived, by men often giving false impressions of their height.
Sarah, Marketing Manager, 35 from London, said ‘ He was at least 4 inches shorter, when I met him in person, then what he said he was online.
I didn’t know if I had a right to be angry about it, but it was hard to ignore.”
It’s understandable as a woman who’s tall that you may want a man to be taller than you, women feel more feminine with a taller guy. From a scientific perspective tallness exaggerates the favoured masculine traits of protection and security – characteristics that evolutionary theorists say women look for when partnering up with the potential father of their children.
A collaborative study from Newscastle Universirty and The University of Groningen revealed that 92.5 per cent of British couples adhere to the ‘husband is taller than the wife’ norm.
But that means if you are 5’2, a guy who is 5’6 is still taller than you.
So don’t rule out a guy, just because of his height, because on the scale of things, if he measures up in all the other important areas, like supporting you, loving you, caring for you, and helping to raise a family, or who will accompany you on your travels, be a companion for life, surely that is far more rewarding.
So next time you go online, or meet a man, consider removing that filter, it could be blocking you from your Mr Right.